Hardship

It's hard being married when David and I have conflicting interests -- he likes to be ultra-playful almost all the time and I want to relax and be serious (taking everything he says seriously). However, when I do take him seriously I get hurt badly -- will there ever be a time when he's in the same wavelength as I? If he were then at least we could understand each other better.

We've been having lots of disagreements and arguments just in the past few days. Mostly these problems occur due to misunderstandings. I want his attention :: He ignores me b/c he's fully involved in a good book or video game. I want to listen about his day :: He shuns me away b/c his mind is elsewhere. I want tender affection/cuddling :: he wants to "beat up" my buns and pester me w/ really rough play. I want this :: he wants that. It's like this everyday. What's worse is sometimes I feel pretty low for some reason and need his attention and he shuns me off like an idiot.

I guess the one good thing that's going well is that he loves his new position at SAIC. He actually comes homes so excited to talk about all the people he's met and experiences he's getting and he just started this week of 12/05/05.

I'm kinda sad though b/c we're going through this rough bump in our relationship and I'm thinking negative thoughts about the future -- as if this marriage wouldn't work as I'd prayed for. =( In reality, we're both walking away from God even though we go to church and committed ourselves to be w/ Christian people. In my positive thinking moments, I want to encourage us to go through Christian couple counseling again. Then in my moments of weakness, I just don't care about him and what kind of heartache this might bring to Dave, Me and our baby.